Surrender?

What, really truly, does it look like to surrender to God?

Yeah, yeah, I could rattle off the answers you'd hear in church. Soul search time for me, though.

So, yes, I surrendered my will to God and moved to Africa. Seems like that was step one of a thousand in this surrender process. The more I get to know the Lord, the more I become aware of how UNsurrendered I am. I'm thankful He loves us anyway, and that whether we go to heaven isn't dependent upon our performance. Christ already took care of that one. AND I'm thankful that He can use us despite our flaws.

I am also aware, though, that the more I surrender to Him and His will, the more peace I have. The more He can use me for His purposes. It's "all good" (thx, Monica), when I surrender to Him. Even if the dying to my selfishness is downright excruciating. It's worth it in the end. And to NOT surrender in actuality is MORE painful.

So, Sooze. Good grief! Give it up! (I'm preaching to myself...)