Called to Serve

Right now we are holding Christmas parties at our Children’s Cup CarePoints. Last year we did three huge parties; this year we’re splitting into teams and doing three a day, one at each CarePoint. We’re thankful for our ‘Cup missionaries and staff, teams from River Valley Church (MN) and Bayside Community Church (FL), as well as volunteers from Healing Place Church Swaziland, without whom we certainly could not pull this off!

Before the parties began, I’ll admit the thought of taking Kayla, Levi, and Trinity to the many days of parties was a little daunting. They’re wiped out after just an afternoon at a CarePoint! Still, I was ready to take it on. Then Ben said, “Sooze, don’t try to take the kids to all the Christmas parties. Just go to the party at Kakhoza.” (That is the CarePoint we consistently visit.) I was relieved at his words.

Now, though, as the parties are going, I’ve battled antagonizing guilt that I’m not there. Some people ask, “Why aren’t you at the parties?” I stumble over my reply. "I am homeschooling the kids and taking them to swimming lessons." It just sounds hollow.

Still, though, I know I’m doing the right thing for us. I sat on our back veranda this morning and spent a little time analyzing the situation and my feelings. Conclusion: It hurts because I’m not attaining people’s approval. BONG! Pride strikes again.

The Holy Spirit reminded me that I’m doing exactly what He wants me to do right now, and that is to be Mom to my kids. I am teaching them to be followers of Jesus. I want to do this on purpose, not just bide my time as a mother, wishing I could go out and do things others are doing. He reminded me that I am ministering to the little ones He wants me to reach.

So, Ben, the Holte’s (staying with us right now), Joyce, Siwe, and Ruth are all coming home from the parties tired and happy. They also come with armloads of red “Serve” shirts to be washed and loaned out to our volunteers the next day. We had three visits last night from others with more dirty shirts for us to wash.

Ah-hah! Now THIS is something I can do! Our machines were busy last night, and they’re going this morning. After putting some shirts in the dryer, I read Jesus’ words:

“If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and be a servant of all.”

I’m sure it’s not coincidence that I read these words at this time. He calls me to serve. He calls us all to serve. That’s it. Do with all our hearts what He leads us to do.

So, my main contribution to the ‘Cup Christmas parties this year: I wash the “Serve” shirts. (And even with that others are helping!) As I was folding a load this morning, I prayed over the people who would be wearing them, that they would be full of the love of Jesus so the little kids would encounter Him in a very real way. I’ll still be praying as the day goes on.

So, no more guilt about not being at all the parties. I’m doing exactly what the Lord wants me to do. I’ll be at Kakhoza tomorrow with our kids, and that’s cool. I’ll wash shirts again tonight. And the next night. And the next!

Speaking of that, I need to go put another load of wet shirts in the dryer…